Realized Something.

His mind won't forget...

what his heart won't erase.

& yes, it is my fault... the one thing that matters the most seems 

to be fading away into the Heart Of Darkness.

i love him.

Mad? Anger? Frustration?

IF YOU DO NOT READ ANY OF THIS... THEN KNOW THIS. GET OVER IT! IF YOU ARE MAD.. THE THINK ALREADY HAPPENED. LET IT GO. BEING UPSET IS NOT GOING TO CHANGE YOUR STATE OF MIND SO YOU MINUS WELL BE HAPPY INSTED OF SITTING UP THERE WITH A BOOT IN YOUR MOUTH. AND STOP TRING TO IMPRESS OTHERS. 

Why waste your time doing something as unproductive as getting upset over something? EXPECIALLY something that one cannot change? For self purposes? Pride? Habit? Being that this is my current state of mind I can accurately answer this question. There are two categories as to why persons get that "feeling" of being upset.

1. Personal Reasons [desire, greed, etc.]
   
2. Surrounding Audiences [because of others, to impress others, show strength, prove a point]

PERSONAL REASONS:

Because this country thrives on "materialism" and "keeping up with the Benjamins," it is only natural for someone to want what someone else has or the next hot thing. When you are born, in a nut shell, you are born a "follower" and not a leader. Everything that you like are desire is becauseyou learned it from your parents, friends, [people in general] or from what you have seen. [like the hottest new trend in fashion.] As a child when your mother didn't get you that candy bar or that stuffed animal... YOU ROSE HELL and all kinda demons with it. You wanted what you wanted and that was that end of it. [triggering emotion you are born with.] When you feel, from what you have been exposed to, that you are not up to par of what you are satisfied with, you create in yourself a lack of contentment. In many cases, it is an emotional release of many emotions that were held in without reconciliation. Everything doesn't function or work without what you want in which you form a type of anger within yourself creating other emotions toward others such as hatred and envy. In extreme cases, you look for something to be upset about just because resulting in your overall demeanor being negative.

SURROUNDING AUDIENCES:

Now we have all said this one before: "Because he made me mad!" To tell you the truth, noone can make you mad or upset. Because you are brought up with this standard in your mind, you sometimes feel as if everyone should meet that requirement: when it comes to pet peeves and dislikes.When others neglect it, or even purposely do those things to upset you, it is YOU that allows that. Noone or anything can make you do anything when you really think about it. "No one can drive you unlessYOU give them the keys to do so" I always say. Some also when someone upsets them stay upset longerthan they have to to prove to someone a point. Another is who is around you at that point in time. For example, when you are with your parents, and like most parents, they have the most embarrassing namethey could think of to call you. When you are with them, it is okay, but as soon as that HOT, SCRUMPTIOUS, SEX SYMBOL is in the presence, that once allowed nickname is now the worse thing inthe world to say to anyone... as if it were profanity. Because of one's want to impress others, that level of approval became limited and now upsets you. Also within many schools, peer pressure has taken over andhave influenced many individuals. Many want to fit in, get in with the in crowd. "Ooh gurl... you gon' let her talk bout you like dat???" First of all... you shouldn't be taking advice from someone that talks like that in the first place... Secondly, you wouldn't believe how upset individuals get when that happens, EXPECIALLYwhen people are watching, to prove a point. You want to show your new "friends" how hard you are and ultimately cause yourself to fall short.

and here comes the million dollar question folks... what you've all been waiting for...

WHY WHY WHY WHY!

Because of you. Nothing but you. It is your choice and that is your way to fulfill it. Simple as that ... You are who you are... and you bring anger and rage on yourself.

Hello World.

I have just created my FIRST blog. I don't expect the world to read it, but what I do expect is total RESPECT. In my endeavors, I will not disrespect anyone... and I ask of the same of that that listen and read what I have to say. Most of what I do say is random. Out of the blue philosophies about life and its rocky pathways. I do listen to what others have to say, because If I didn't, I wouldn't be the person that I am today. I am not arrogant nor ignorant... I express my feelings in many ways... other than what the average person would see or feel. I will do my best to keep everything flowing and if there are any questions, lemme know. I am an easy going type of person and I don't toot my nose up to persons. You never know what they have been through or "their struggle" ... so keep peace... love... and love more.

Ciao

My Eighteenth Birthday Party!